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My Husband Thinks My Unborn Baby Is His

Ask Sheila: How do I tell him that it is not?

BY Ask Sheila

Apr 29, 2022, 08:46 AM

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Hey Sheila!

I have a secret that has been eating me up and I believe that you can help me. I am a 29-year-old woman, who is newlywed. My wedding was everything that I always dreamt it would be and the best part of it all is that I got married to a real gentleman, who has shown me nothing but love since the day we met, 3 years ago. I have been keeping a secret form him and everyone because I know if I told him, it would break my very new marriage and his heart.

When we met, everything was going so well and we were on our honeymoon phase for the longest time. But I made a mistake one time and cheated on him. He doesn’t know about me cheating on him. A few weeks after my mistake, I found out that I was pregnant and this is what led to him proposing and us getting married. I have never seen him excited about anything, as much as he was when he found out that I was
pregnant

I just had to do a paternity test to find out if he was the father because I needed to be sure. That was before the wedding and everything. This is now where my problem is. It turned out that he is not the father, and I knew that way before the wedding. I am almost 8 months pregnant and I do not know how I will break the news to him, if at all I will. Please Sheila, advise me on what to do.


Dear Beautiful Woman, 

That is one big secret to keep. I don’t know how you have been able to do it. From the proposal, to the wedding, and you said nothing? Well, I won’t judge you but something needs to be done. You need to tell that man the truth because eventually, it may not be now, but eventually, he will come to know the truth. What if the baby doesn’t resemble him even one bit, don’t you think he will have questions? The right thing to do is to tell him the truth and make peace with what will happen next. 


The worst that may happen is a divorce and sis, you will not be the first one to go through it. He might decide to choose to love you and take care of the baby but that is so unlikely. Because you have kept this a secret for too long. If you had told him from the beginning, maybe, just maybe, he would have let go of everything and forgiven you. But now, he has a right to know that the unborn baby, is not his. Do not string along the lie for the rest of your marriage. Best to rip that bandage off and be done with it. What happens next won’t be sweet, I can assure you that, but you will no longer be living a lie. 


Yours Truly,