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Unfollow Your Ex On Social Media Now!

Yes, this is an intervention

BY Stephanie Kapfunde

Mar 15, 2021, 01:47 PM

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If you've found yourself down the rabbit hole of your ex's Instagram feed after days, months or even years after you ended, you'll be glad to know you're the only weirdo.

According to the Australian mental health specialist Dr Lars Madsen; a third of people of the people he sampled in research admitted they Facebook-stalked an ex-partner at least once a week. Of course, you just want to know what your ex has been up to. Did he get that job he always wanted, is he thriving or stuck in a rut because his rib is gone? Does he still wear that watch you bought him for his birthday? Does he still do that thing with his tongue in selfies? Is he happy? - Scratch that, is he happier than you?  Has he found someone new? Are they better looking than you? Has someone dared to take your place?
"Social media stalking obstructs the natural process of getting over an ex.” - Dr Lars Madsen (Mindshift Foundation)
I am here to tell you that, none of these answers will help you HEAL! Nope!  Creating an alias to connect with your ex's Private Instagram or Twitter isn't clever. It's high-key creepy with a heavy dose of cray-cray. All the reason for you to cut it out now!

It Might Be Because You're Addicted

If you can't explain the constant impulse to stalk your ex online; the bad news is scientifically speaking, you might need ex rehab. No really, scientists have proven that our brain thinks love is a literal drug and as a result, we are in constant pursuit of our next hit, even if it's over. In a study that determines how our brains react to different stimuli. Researchers found a weird similarity in how drugs and love/passion stimulate us. Studies of cocaine- and opioid-induced euphoria have shown increased brain activity that seems to overlap which how the brain responds to love or their loved one.
"This suggests a potentially close neural link between romantic love and euphoric states " - The neural basis of romantic love (The neural basis of romantic love)

Time To Detox That Mofo

Yes, honey! You need an ex-cleanse and that includes social media. To be honest, do you really want to see his relationship notification on Facebook or worse yet high-resolution pictures of his ama-lobolo ceremony on Your timeline?  Yes, he did move on that fast and honestly, it's none of your business now. Okay, maybe that's a tad bit harsh. Ok'salayo, just let it go moghel. Stop with the self-torture. 

No, You Aren't Weak  

Being part of an unspoken showdown over who unblocks who first is not only toxic, it's unnecessary. No, you aren't weak for blocking or unfollowing your ex. If things ended in the most unlikely way, pleasantly, you are just giving your mind and heart a chance to start over and rewire. Sis, how will you do that if your WhatsApp status feed is packed with what your ex did for the weekend while you SBWL in the shadows? For the sake of your mental health put the pride aside and reset. 

It's Not Forever

Remember it doesn't have to be permanent. You can unfollow for just long enough for you to feel like yourself again. For you to no longer be triggered by the past. This can take a week, month or even years. Do what you've got to do to protect your peace because it is yours to protect.

If you want to close this chapter and most importantly want to heal, you need to let go of the virtual hold you have on your ex so that you're ready for your next. It rhymes so it must be true. Now go out there, let go of someone's son and rest!

Read:  You Don't Have To Be Strong All The Time